


Not Letting Go

by WynterRobin



Series: Soulmate AU [2]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: F/M, Jason Todd is Red Hood, Reader-Insert, Soulmate AU, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-10-10 06:10:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10430856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WynterRobin/pseuds/WynterRobin
Summary: He watched, stunned, as you ran down the street and away from him. It was only when you were already out of sight that Jason recognized your words. They were written on his wrist. Jason took a minute to just stand there, thoughts racing. He had just met his soulmate. And she had taken one look and ran for it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on tumblr here! https://wynterrobin.tumblr.com/

Your feet pounded off the concrete ground as you dashed down the street, ignoring the incredulous looks and glares being thrown your way by the other pedestrians. You were panting hard for breath but you didn’t dare stop, afraid of what your mother would think if you were late home. you knew she worried about you constantly as it was, it wouldn’t do to give her any more reason. Your father had walked out on the two of you when you were six. Your mother had gotten pregnant with you at sixteen and run away to Gotham with the man she’d fallen in love with. Since he’d left the only family either of you had was each other. Your mother worked hard to give you the best life she could, and you tried to reciprocate by making an effort to worry her as little as possible. She had enough on her plate as it was. You’d be lying if you said it wasn’t hard, putting in your best effort despite how tired or defeated you might feel. You didn’t always succeed, but you did your best. 

It was a sunny Friday afternoon, and the streets of Gotham were packed with citizens milling about making the most of the summer heat. You ducked and weaved around them as best you could, but you were beginning to overheat and you knew your reflexes were getting sloppy. It didn’t help that you were wearing a long sleeved shirt. It wasn’t by choice; that morning you had misplaced the hairbands you normally wore on your wrist to conceal your soulmark. When you had proudly displayed it to your mother on the morning of your thirteenth birthday she had told you gently that while it was superb that it had appeared, it would be best if you kept it covered. Your teachers wouldn’t be pleased to see swear words written on your skin, however involuntary it was. You had been heartbroken at first to have to keep your soulmate’s words covered, but now you were mostly indifferent. It was just another in a long chain of disappointments. 

You were regretting your choice of clothing now though, your clothes were beginning to stick to your skin. You jogged around a corner into a shadier side street to get respite from the sun, hoping that your detour wouldn’t cost you any extra time. The second you did you smacked face first into something solid, falling back onto the ground with an “Oof,” You shook your head, dazed, and noticed a pair of legs just inches from your face. ‘Huh, that’s weird,’ 

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry! Are you okay?” It took a moment for the words to register, and then you looked up into the face of the (outrageously handsome) man you had just bumped into. 

______________________________________

Jason had been cooped up in the manor for days. He had sprained his wrist on patrol earlier in the week and Bruce had been very firm that he stay off patrol until it healed. It was just starting to drive him nuts when Alfred suggested he take a walk downtown and collect the ingredients he would need for dinner that evening. Jason wasn’t fooled, he knew Alfred could get them delivered if he wanted to, and this was a blatant ploy to get Jason out of the house before someone ended up seriously injured when he finally lost his head. Jason didn’t call him out on it, he was grateful for the excuse. 

He wasn’t overly fond of crowds however, the general atmosphere in Gotham that day was making him claustrophobic. Thus why he was walking down a narrow and less densely populated street when you had come around the corner and bashed right into his chest. He hadn’t been expecting it in the slightest, and having a grocery bag in each hand made him slow to react. “Oh shit, I’m so sorry, are you okay?” He wasn’t sure if he was apologizing for being in the way or for failing to catch you when you fell. He juggled the bags into one hand and extended the other to help you up. You seemed confused, and he worried that you might have hurt yourself. When your eyes met his you gasped, ignoring his hand and scrambling to your feet on your own. “I’m fine, I’m so sorry, I have to go!” 

He watched, stunned, as you ran down the street and away from him. It was only when you were already out of sight that Jason recognized your words. They were written on his wrist. Jason took a minute to just stand there, thoughts racing. He had just met his soulmate. And she had taken one look and ran for it. Self loathing crept in like a slow fog. Of course you had, that was just Jason’s luck. A soulmate was the one thing life had promised him, the one person who was guaranteed to love him for himself. And even you didn’t want him. ‘No,’ The thought came unexpected, with a force that startled him. Jason had been waiting for this all his life, he’d be damned if he let you go without even giving him a chance first. If you decided he was an asshole then, that was your choice. But fuck it if he was sick of being disappointed. 

______________________________________

When you reached your house you were already in tears. You had to take a moment to steady your breathing and pull yourself together before you went inside. A little part of you hated yourself for what you had just done, but you knew it was for the best. You weren’t going to give anyone else a chance to come into your life and mess it up further, even if it was your soulmate. You’d had enough of that already. You had been fine on your own for this long, that wasn’t going to change. “Mom I’m home!” You called into the quiet house, waiting for a reply before venturing into the kitchen. Maybe she had fallen asleep on the sofa again; starting a new job meant that she had been exhausted lately. There was a note on the table with your name on it and you unfolded it curiously. 

“I’ve had to trade shifts at work today, sorry sweetie! Dinner is in the fridge. I’ll be home by 10, be safe! I love you. - Mom Xx’

You shook your head in disbelief, groaning. All that running for nothing. And meeting him! Well, it wasn’t like that could have been avoided. Fate and all that. You felt a twinge of loneliness at your mum’s absence but shrugged it off. She was doing her best for the both of you. You just wished there was somebody you could tell…

_____________________________________

You were sitting at your bedroom desk studying when there was a knock on your window. You jumped, letting out a surprised yelp. Your eyes flew to the window, your heart pounding. It was starting to get dark outside and you could only make out the tall silhouette of a person standing in your fire escape. You hesitated, unsure whether to check who it was or to run downstairs and lock yourself into the kitchen. The person knocked again, and you attempted to console yourself with the logic that if they were going to break in they probably would have done so already, as opposed to knocking first to warn you. Against your better judgement you edged towards the window, your heart in your throat. When you were close enough you could see that it was the man from earlier. ‘Your soulmate,’ a little voice in your head whispered. You told it to shut up. 

You wrenched open the window and glared out at him, trying to ignore the way your stomach flipped when he just grinned back at you. You hissed, “Did you follow me home?!” You didn’t know if you were disturbed or impressed. You figured it should probably be disturbed. The man ignored your question, outstretching a hand towards you, seemingly for a handshake. “Hey. I’m Jason Todd, your soulmate. But you already knew that. Could we talk?” His casual tone threw you off, and unthinkingly you mumbled your name, taking his hand. The contact sent a jolt of energy through you and you wrenched your hand back, shivering. Jason just shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. He seemed unaffected, but you noticed that he was looking at you a little too intensely to be casual. You deliberated for a moment, unsure whether or not you should refuse him. Eventually you decided that to do so would be rude, and this man hadn’t done anything to deserve that. Yet. You shrugged and ducked through the window, swinging yourself out onto the fire escape. Jason stepped back to give you room, letting out a surprised chuckle. You leaned back against the window, eyes narrowed and arms crossed. “Talk then,” 

He seemed unperturbed by your words, scuffing his shoe against the metal floor while he formulated his reply. Eventually he said, “Look, I’m not exactly the best guy. But I’ve been waiting to meet you for a long time. I’d appreciate it if you’d at least get to know me before you decide that you don’t like me,” His tone was lighthearted; You would think he was joking if it weren’t for the seriousness of his gaze. You gulped. His request was only fair. You let out a heavy sigh as you brushed past him to sit on the stairwell. “That seems fair. Let’s get to know each other then. But I’m not promising anything, I don’t really buy into this whole soulmate business,” you warned. His answering smile was breathtaking. 

_____________________________________

You sat on the fire escape together for hours, talking about anything and everything right up until you heard your mum in the hallway calling out to you. The conversation flowed effortlessly between you, and to your utter dismay you found that you really liked this man. He was witty and clever and kind, and you felt entirely at ease in his presence. Like he had been made just for you. You told him about your dad, and about how you and your mom had had to manage on your own all these years. He had nodded understandingly, and told you a little of his own story. You were shocked and upset by his words, guilty now at having rejected him so quickly earlier. You could only imagine how that had made him feel. When it started to get cold he had shrugged off his jacket and handed it to you. The leather was warm when you pulled it on and smelled like oil and metal. It was a strangely appealing scent.

Your mom’s voice startled you, you hadn’t noticed that it had gotten so late. ”Up here mom!” You yelled through the window, praying she could hear you as you stood up. “I guess you have to go,” Jason smiled at you ruefully. You nodded, and surprising yourself, leaned in for a hug. He hugged you back without hesitation, holding you firmly to his chest as you both just drank in the others presence. When you at last pulled back you were blushing. “You will come back won’t you?” “Of course. You couldn’t stop me if you tried,” He joked. You started to take off his jacket but he shook his head. “Keep it. I’ll get it back from you next time,” “Okay,” You bit your lip to try to rein in the smile threatening to take over your face, but he noticed anyway and laughed. “You’d better go before your mum comes up here and catches us. Explaining that would be fun,” He raised an eyebrow at you. “Oh of course!” You scrambled back through the window, turning back to wave at him shyly. “Goodnight Jason,” “Goodnight, sweet dreams doll,” He teased, before disappearing down the stairwell. It was only when you emerged in the kitchen to greet your mum, grinning like a fool, that you remembered that you were still wearing Jason’s jacket.


	2. Chapter 2

Meeting Jason in your fire escape became a regular thing after that night, unconventional though it was. If you were honest with yourself, you were glad that your relationship hadn’t progressed any further than that yet. You liked Jason. A lot. Much more than you would care to admit. But you were still hesitant when it came to your relationship and wanted to take it slow. You had seen what falling in love had done to your mum and honestly you were scared. Jason seemed to understand though and never tried to rush you, even though it had been a couple of weeks since you had met. At first he would only come once every few days. You would be sitting at your desk reading or sprawled out across your duvet listening to music when the knock on the window would come. Immediately your stomach would fill with butterflies and you’d find yourself grinning stupidly, heart pounding as you rushed to the window and yanked it open. The sight of him was like a balm, soothing your nerves and easing tension that you hadn’t even been aware of until it was gone. Jason’s expression would turn soft as soon as he caught sight of you, and he would offer you his hand to help you clamber out the window. More recently he had started to simply grab your waist and lift you out the window himself, laughing when you struggled and protested. You blushed every damn time, and you guessed that might just be the reason that he did it.

  
You had known Jason for almost three weeks before you invited him in. Even then it was more out of necessity than anything. It was a Wednesday evening, and it was pouring rain outside. The rain had never bothered you before, but since meeting Jason you had come to hate it. Rain meant no visit from your soulmate that night, and it had already been two days since you had seen him last. You missed him, and the intensity of the feeling frightened you. Already the thought that Jason might just not come back was intolerable, you didn’t want to think about what that might mean. So it was that you were laying on your stomach across your bed, head propped up in your hand while you read a book, when you heard the already familiar sound of Jason knocking on your window. You almost didn’t hear it over the torrential sound of rain against the roof overhead, but when you identified it you jumped up and raced to the window, fumbling with the latch and flinging it open. Instantly you were subject to the full force of the storm outside, rain splattering your face as you leaned out into the wind and squinted into the darkness. Jason stood just outside your window, soaking wet and grinning like an idiot. To say you were surprised was an understatement. His clothes clung to his skin, soaked through with rain, and his hair was stuck to his forehead in complete disaray. “Jason! What are you doing?” You had to yell over the sound of the wind, a mixture of horrified and amazed. “I just had to see you doll,” he admitted, having the dignity to look sheepish. “Uh, could I..” “Oh! Oh of course, come in!” You jolted back from the window, giving Jason room to clamber in and shut it behind him, soaking your carpet as he did so. “Sorry to drop in uninvited doll, I know you don’t like it,” he was rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes apologetic when he looked at you. You softened immediately, realising that despite your previous inhibitions you were actually delighted that he was here. “Don’t worry about it.” You smiled at him warmly. “Just.. stay there while I grab you a towel. Like seriously, don’t move, you’ll get everything wet,” you warned, turning for the door. He replied with a mock solemn “Yes ma'am”.

  
When you returned carrying a stack of towels you found him in the exact same spot you had left him in. You tossed him one, only sorry that you didn’t have any spare clothes to offer. You made do with taking his jacket, shirt and shoes and putting them on the radiator to dry off. You tried not to stare at his chest while he changed and failed miserably. He chuckled when he caught you looking and you blushed bright red, resolutely looking at the floor as you took his clothing from him. “Thanks sweetheart,” He mused your hair fondly, and you protested, blushing even harder now. “Hey!” You grumbled, ducking out from under his hand and giggling, going to hang up his clothes. When you turned back he had a towel wrapped around his shoulders, concealing his torso but making it no easier for you to ignore the fact that Jason was standing in your room in only his jeans and if your mother walked in you were as good as dead. Of course that was only if you didn’t die of heart failure first because god he was beautiful. You had known he was well built, but you hadn’t even guessed at just how toned he was until now. It was making you feel insecure about your own body just looking at him. You bit your lip, suddenly unsure. Jason picked up on your change of mood and came over to you, cupping your cheek gently in one hand while the other arm encircled your waist, drawing you closer to him. “Hey, everything okay?” His eyes were gentle, captivating, and you found you couldn’t lie to him. You looked down, whispering, “You’re amazing Jay. And I’m.. well, me. You deserve better,” Saying the words out loud made you feel vulnerable. “Sweetheart, listen,” Jason’s voice was unexpectedly serious when he spoke. “I have done very bad things in my life. Hell, I still do. People like me probably don’t deserve a soulmate at all,” Despite yourself you felt a trill of fear go through your body at his words. But then his voice dropped lower, softened. “And then I get you. Doll, you are the most amazing, brilliant, gorgeous person I have ever met.” You looked up at him, stunned, and then Jason leaned in, closing the distance between you and pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was slow, gentle, and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders to anchor yourself. When he pulled back you were breathless, feeling like you were floating off the ground. His hands were on your hips steadying you, and he rested his forehead against yours, his proximity and the smell of leather and metal surrounded you and made you feel safe. “Jason,” you breathed, dazed, and he chuckled, hugging you close.

  
Somehow you ended up laying on your bed, tucked securely against Jason’s chest as you just cuddled and talked quietly. You had expected the dynamic between the two of you to change when he kissed you, but instead you just felt even more connected to him than you had before. It felt natural to be with him like this, and as much as your brain wanted you to freak out you just couldn’t. Instead you were just relaxed, happy. At some stage during the night you fell asleep like that, Jason’s fingers tangled in your hair as you snuggled into him, feeling content and whole for what may have been the first time in your life.


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing that registered in your brain when you woke up the next morning was that you felt extremely warm. Also, your pillow seemed to be rising up and down ever so slightly. You grumbled irritably, nuzzling into it in an attempt to get back to sleep. A low resounding chuckle jolted you into wakefulness and your eyes shot open, only to find Jason looking down at you, his expression fond. “Goodmorning to you too,” he greeted, tone bemused. You realised belatedly that you were laying across his chest, apparently doing a very good impression of an octopus judging by the way your limbs were entangled with his. You gasped, feeling your face heat up as you attempted to scramble away.“Jay I’m so sorry! I didn’t” “Shhhhh,” he hushed you, strong arms wrapping around your waist in a vice like grip to keep you from wriggling away. “Calm down doll, it’s alright,” His tone was soothing; you were sure you were red as a tomato right now. Nonetheless you halted your frantic attempt to escape, instead choosing to hide your face against his chest with an embarrassed groan. Jason removed a hand from your waist to stroke your hair; you could hear the amusement in his voice when he spoke. “See? No harm done.” “I’m sorry I sleep like an octopus,” Your voice was muffled against his skin, but you knew he had heard you when he laughed, the sound vibrating in his chest beneath your ear. For some reason hearing it made you feel all warm and tingly. You groaned internally at your own mushiness. “Naw, you’re the best blanket I’ve ever had. I usually toss them off when I sleep. This morning I got to wake up warm for once,” You knew he was only trying to make you feel better, but it still worked. Unconsciously you started to relax against him. Then a thought struck horror into you. “Wait.. how long have you been awake?” Jason paused, and you already had your answer. “Oh god,” You moaned, defeated. He’d been awake before you and seen you attempting to entwine around him in your sleep. “Don’t be embarrassed doll, it’s adorable,” You just shook your head, deciding to let the subject drop before you died of mortification. “What time is it?” You turned your head to try and catch a glimpse of the alarm clock on your bedside table. “Eight thirty. Do you have to be somewhere?” His hold on you tightened fractionally, and you smiled at the reluctance in his words. “Yeah, I have class at ten,” You apologised, then paused. “You want to stay for breakfast?” Hope was like a living thing in your chest. You struggled to ignore it, glancing up at Jason. He grinned. “Doll I’d love to,”

  
You went to grab a quick shower, leaving Jason to sprawl across your bed and snuggle into your covers. The sight of him like that made it extremely difficult not to just climb back into bed and cuddle up with him, but somehow you managed not to. Once you were in the shower you took a moment to freak out, hopping up and down under the spray of hot water and hugging yourself tightly. The mix of excitement and nervousness was making you feel wired, and you had to take a few deep breaths to calm down, resting your head against the cold tile. You had never felt this way about anyone before Jason, had never allowed yourself to, and not just because he was your soulmate. It wasn’t uncommon for people to date others who weren’t their soulmate, you never knew when you would meet them so it wasn’t always practical to wait around. Your father hadn’t been your mum’s soulmate, they had been fifteen when they started dating in middle school. No, you had just been scared. Honestly you still were. Scared that Jason would leave, and even more scared of what would happen if he didn’t. His potential to change your future was almost terrifying. Your plan in life had never been very detailed, but a couple of things had always been concrete. You would go to college, graduate, get a stable job and make things better for both yourself and your mum. Now everything seemed uncertain. You still wanted to do all those things, but you didn’t know what impact Jason would have on that yet. And you knew already that you would give up so much to keep him with you.

  
When you had finished with your shower and gotten dressed, you checked that Jason’s clothes were dry and directed him towards the bathroom so he could clean up. Then you headed downstairs to start on breakfast. Your mum had already left for work so you didn’t have to worry about explaining why Jason was here. The night you had come downstairs wearing his jacket you had told her that it belonged to one of your friends. At the time you weren’t sure where things were going between the two of you and you didn’t want to get your mum’s hopes up. You knew she hoped you would meet your soulmate sooner rather than later, and you didn’t want to tell her that you weren’t sold on the concept. Now though… You figured you should probably tell her soon. You mused over how you would go about breaking the news while you set about preparing breakfast, putting bacon and eggs to fry on the stove while you set the table. Jason emerged just as you were plating up the food, fresh and damp from the shower. He leaned in the doorway grinning at you, jacket drapped over his shoulder. You grinned back, unable to help yourself. His smile was infectious. “Smells delicious,” He commented, coming up behind you to wrap his arms around your waist, lowering his head to nuzzle into your neck. He sniffed, growling playfully. You let out a surprised laugh when you got the joke, swatting at him with the teatowel you were using to handle the hot plates. He chuckled, releasing you, and went to sit in the chair you shooed him towards. “Sorry, I didn’t know how you like your eggs,” you apologised, setting his plate down and taking your own seat across from him. He shook his head. “It looks great, thank you,” He hummed appreciatively when he took a bite and you smiled, tucking into your own food. “So what classes do you have today doll?” You chatted casually about your plan for the day, Jason interjecting occasionally to ask questions. He always seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say, and you found that you loved that about him. “How about you? Any plans?” You asked curiously. He grimaced. “Just helping Bruce out with some W.E work probably,” You had been genuinely confounded when Jason told you that he was the supposedly dead son of the billionare Bruce Wayne. All he had told you about the issue was that it had been a kidnapping gone wrong, and Bruce had genuinely thought him dead. He had decided afterwards that announcing that Jason was alive after so long would cause an uproar; it wasn’t the kind of story Wayne Enterprises would want to be associated with. You hadn’t questioned it any further than that. You could sense that it was a sore subject, and you knew that Jason would tell you more when he was ready.

  
Jason stayed to help you wash up after breakfast, a little voice in the back of your mind noting with satisfaction how well you worked together. Once you were finished you hugged him goodbye at the door, promising to text him later once you got home. You had admitted to him a while back that you often waited up in case he decided to come over, and after that he had taken your phone number, promising to message you in the evening if he was going to drop by. He had seemed pleased by your admission, jokingly adding a heart next to his name in your phone. Once he was gone you sat at the counter with your school work, deciding to review your notes before class. Not even five minutes later your mum popped her head around the kitchen door, nearly giving you a heart attack. “Ohmygod mum! I thought you had work this morning!” You gasped, cluthing a hand to your chest. “I thought you were an intruder!” You accused, and then realised that if she was home it meant that she knew Jason had been here. You were so screwed. Your mum just smiled knowingly. “I switched shifts. Is that boy gone? I must say he’s very handsome,” She breezed in, filling the kettle to make herself a cup of tea. “Of course I knew when I saw the jacket that he probably would be, he has very good taste,” She turned to give you a wink and you groaned, letting your head fall into your hands. Of course she knew. When had you ever been able to hide anything from her?

  
Your mum called your name and you looked up, finding her leaning against the counter looking at you, arms folded. “Is he your soulmate?” She wasn’t angry that you’d had a boy over and hadn’t told her, you knew that she trusted you. Still, you found that you were surprised nonetheless. You had been expecting more of a reaction. Instead she seemed happy, you suspected maybe even excited. You nodded hesitantly. “Yeah.. His name’s Jason,” She smiled. “Jason,” She repeated, mulling the name over. “How did you meet him?” You groaned internally. You knew this wouldn’t be the only time you would be asked this question, and quite frankly the answer was kind of embarrassing. “I kind of ran into him in town.. literally. He offered to help me up and I uh, I ran away,” you admitted, and she laughed, shaking her head fondly. “Of course you did. At least he had the sense to follow you. God knows I’ve been waiting for this long enough.” You hesitated. “Would you, um. Would you like to meet him?” You weren’t quite sure why you were asking. You knew you should probably clear it with Jason first, but you knew he was secretly dying to bring you home himself. You didn’t think he would mind. “I would love to. Why don’t you invite him over for dinner tonight?” “Okay,” you mumbled, and your mum smiled warmly, coming over to hug you tightly. You squeezed back, glad to finally be able to talk about Jason to her. Once you were outside and on your way to class you decided to send Jason a text. ‘Mum found out about you. She wants to know if you’d like to come for dinner tonight? x’ You hesitated a little before adding the x, feeling childish, before deciding to hell with it and sending the message. Jason texted back almost immediately. ‘What time? I’ll be there. (: x’ You smiled to yourself, nervous excitement taking root in the pit of your stomach. It was going to be a long day.


	4. Chapter 4

  
“Hey, do you guys think the tie is too much?”

Every pair of eyes in the room immediately turned to look at Jason, who was standing awkwardly in the doorway to the kitchen and fidgeting uncomfortably with his collar. Tim let out a low whistle. Dick grinned at him from his seat at the table where he was working his way through a plate of Alfred’s cookies. “You clean up okay Jaybird,” Jason could feel the heat creeping up his neck at the unwanted attention. Normally he’d have brushed them off, made a sassy comment about his dashing good looks or some crap like that. But truthfully he was nervous as hell. When he’d told Bruce he couldn’t go on patrol with them that night he’d made the stupid mistake of giving him the honest reason why. And of course, he’d done so while Dick was in the room. And now they all knew. 

It wasn’t like they hadn’t known about you already. When Jason came home with the groceries at almost midnight, huge grin plastered on his face and minus his jacket, it made sense that questions were going to be asked. Jason had been only too proud to tell everyone that he’d met his soulmate. (He conveniently left out that the reason he was home so late was only because he’d had to climb up your fire escape to get you to talk to him.) Naturally, everything went kind of crazy after that. Alfred and Dick were delighted. Tim was just annoyed that out of all them, Jason had met his soulmate first. He’d had to explain repeatedly that yes, you were real and no, he was pretty sure you weren’t secretly a supervillian or anything of the sort. (Damian was still skeptical about that part.) Bruce, for his part, had seemed almost proud. He’d clapped Jason firmly on the shoulder amid all the chaos, looking him straight in the eye and nodding once. In his eyes Jason could see the echo of a conversation they’d had repeatedly when Jason had first come home after being brought back to life. He’d been full of anger and self loathing and hate; it had taken a long time before he’s started to believe Bruce when he said that he still belonged at his side. _‘You deserve this.’_ His eyes seemed to say. Jason had wanted more than anything to believe him. 

Jason shifted his gaze over to Alfred, who had just emerged from the kitchen holding a cake tin. “Alfred?” He asked hopefully. “You look dashing Master Jason,” Alfred pressed the tin into his hands with a fond smile, straightening out his collar with practiced hands. Damian, who had been quiet until then, spoke up, “You’re going to meet her mother not to a business meeting,” He gave Jason’s outfit a disgusted glance.   
Jason was ashamed to admit that he startled a little when he heard Bruce chuckle behind him, spinning around to see his father figure approaching with a slight smile. Jason stepped aside to let him pass. Bruce clapped him on the shoulder _again_ , pausing as he did so, and Jason figured he must be doing something right lately if he was on the receiving end of the older man’s approval so frequently. “You’ll understand soon enough Damian,” He said wryly. Jason wasn’t sure if these family moments were heartwarming or just plain weird. 

~~~~~

You’d been a nervous wreck for at least an hour before Jason arrived. You had redone your hair at least three times by now, set the table and then decided you didn’t like the tableware and set it again. You had tried to help your mum with the cooking but she had shooed you away, saying that like this you were no help to her and to just sit down and try to relax. You were drumming your fingers agitatedly against the counter when the doorbell finally rang. Jason was exactly on time. You jumped up, straightening out your skirt as you half ran to open the door. Your mum laughed, watching you with amusement from where she was plating up the food.   
You took a deep breath before turning the handle, swinging the door open to reveal Jason standing on the other side. The sight of him took your breath away. The first thing you noticed was that he was wearing a suit. His blazer was slung over his shoulder, his hair gelled back in careful disaray and he was the most gorgeous thing you had ever seen. “Hi,” you greeted breathlessly. He grinned down at you, eyes sparkling playfully. “Hey there sweetheart,” He cast you an admiring glance, “You look stunning,”   
You blushed, smiling up at him, “Not so bad yourself,” You reached for his hand and squeezed gently, needing the reassurance and knowing that he probably did too. “Thank you for coming, Mum’s really looking forward to meeting you,” Jason held your hand tightly in his. “Of course sweetheart. Wouldn’t have dreamed of saying no,” He joked, “I need to thank her for taking care of you for me,”  
You just rolled your eyes, taking a step back and tugging him into the house. “Come on in then,” You sighed dramatically, and he was still laughing fondly when you led him into the kitchen.   
Once there he stopped just inside the doorway, hovering uncertainly. You felt your heart melt a little just looking at him. You gave him a tiny reasuring smile and turned to face your mum. “Mum, this is Jason. Jason, Mum,” You gestured between them with the hand that wasn’t gripping Jason’s tightly. 

You didn’t think that you had ever been this nervous in your life. You didn’t doubt for a second that your mum would love Jason; honestly she would probably have loved him just for being your soulmate even if he wasn’t as loveable as you knew him to be. Your mum had a way of seeing straight to the heart of a person; you knew she would see past the tough guy exterior straight away. But regardless of that, the fact was that you were introducing the two most important people in your life. It wasn’t an experience you’d ever had before, and you had to admit you were kind of terrified. A little part of your brain still worried, what would happen if they didn’t get along?   
That part of your brain was silenced effectively when your mum (to both your surprise and Jason’s) looked up from what she was doing, smiled warmly, and quickly came over to pull Jason into a firm hug.   
Jason met your gaze with wide eyes, looking completely stunned. When your mum stepped back she was still smiling, eyes crinkled up at the corners when she introduced herself. “It’s so good to finally meet you Jason. Come on in and take a seat, dinner’s just about ready,” “You too Ma'am. Thank you for having me over,” You noticed with relief that there was a tiny lopsided smile on your boyfriend’s lips. His eyes looked suspiciously damp, but it might have just been your imagination. Your mum just squeezed his arm fondly before returning to the counter. “It’s a pleasure to have you. And please, none of this ‘Ma'am’ stuff, I’m not that old,” she joked. You giggled, covering your mouth to try to hide the sound, but Jason noticed and threw you an amused glance. You just shook your head, leading him over to the table. 

You weren’t used to having other people over for dinner, nevermind your soulmate. So it was surprising how natural it felt, having Jason here. To your great pleasure he hit it off with your mum almost immediately. Of course there were few people who didn’t; she was naturally good with people and made almost everyone feel at ease around her. The conversation flowed easily, and you could tell that Jason was starting to relax as a little of his usual confidence started to show through.   
“That was delicious, thank you,”   
Jason stated genuinely as he set down his fork and knife, plate completely cleaned. Both you and your mum laughed at his enthusiasm. “I’m glad you liked it. We have plenty to spare if you’d like to take some home with you,” Jason smiled wryly, shaking his head in refusal of her offer. “Thanks, but I think that’d insult Alfred, and I don’t want to get on his bad side. He takes great pride in feeding us,” Your mum nodded, laughing. “I understand. You’ll just have to come back next time then. And you can give my thanks to Alfred for the beautiful cake, it was very kind of him,”   
You looked up from finishing off your food, raising an eyebrow at Jason. “You brought cake? When?” He grinned. “I was holding it when I got here,” Your mum laughed fondly, shaking her head. “That’s my observative daughter for you,” Jason nodded his agreement. “It’s amazing she’s survived this long, you’ve done an incredible job,” Your mum leaned in conspiratorially, stage whispering, “It wasn’t easy, I’ll tell you that,”  
“Hey!” You protested, and they both just laughed at your expense. You huffed, pushing back your chair and standing up. “I’m going to make tea now, try not to miss me,”   
Jason smiled up at you easily, and it was impossible to stay mad at him. Instead you just rolled your eyes in mock annoyance, ignoring your mum laughing at you. Jason just stood to join you, still grinning. “Here, let me help you,”   
Your mum was standing then too, shaking her head at him. “Jason sweetie sit down, it’ll only take a minute,” “Thank you, but I’d prefer to help out. It’s how Alfred raised us, and you don’t want to disappoint Alfred,” he joked, gathering the plates from the table.  
You went to fill the kettle with water and track down this mythological cake while they chatted. You enjoyed listening to them talk so easily. It had been a long time since there had been anyone but the two of you around; it gave you a sense of pride to think that you were partially responsible for the change.   
“Is Alfred your adoptive father?” You heard your mum ask curiously. You glanced up inconspicuously from slicing the cake to gauge Jason’s reaction. Your mum knew that Jason was adopted and had a few brothers, but she didn’t know much more than that. You had figured it was Jason’s choice what he wanted to tell her.   
He shook his head, looking slightly embarrassed. “Alfred’s our butler, but he’s pretty much family to us. He had as much of a hand in raising us as Bruce did,”   
To her credit, your mum didn’t so much as pause. She just nodded, expression contemplative when she answered. “Well he sounds like a lovely man. Maybe I’ll meet him some day.. if there’s an occasion to?” She threw you a mischievous look and you gasped, scandalized at what she was implying. “Mum!” Your cheeks heated up, not daring to look at Jason in fear of what his reaction would be. Trust your mum to bring up marriage the first time you brought him home. “I’m sure he would love that,” Jason assured with a chuckle, footsteps growing louder as he came over to put the last of the dishes in the sink and turned on the water. You just groaned in embarrassment, and he reached over to give your hand a gentle squeeze. 

Once you had finished cleaning up you all say down together again for tea and cake. Alfred’s cake was incredible, and you told Jason so once you’d taken the first bite, humming in pleasure at the taste. “I’ll tell him you said so,” he promised.   
Eventually, it was late enough that Jason had to go home. You were all reluctant for him to leave. Your mum hugged him goodbye, and this time Jason wrapped an arm around her and hugged back hesitantly. You thought it was probably the most heartwarming thing you had ever witnessed. She told him firmly to come back any time before leaving you to see him to the door. Jason told her that he would.   
Once outside you wrapped your arms around yourself to shield yourself from the chilly night air, shivering. Jason noticed immediately and paused in putting on his jacket, holding it out to you. You shook your head. “I’m fine, honestly. I’ll be back inside in a minute. Wouldn’t want you to get sick and not get to see you for a week,” Jason just smirked at you cockily. “Doll, it’d take more than a little cold air to get me sick, trust me,”   
You rolled your eyes, shoving him playfully. “Cocky much?” He grinned, taking your hands in his, eyes sparkling with mirth. “You love it,”   
You looked away, shrugging casually. “Maybe,” Jason laughed, and when you looked up to meet his eyes he leaned in to kiss you. You melted into him happily, lingering for a moment before you pulled away with reluctance.   
“Thank you for having me over tonight doll, it was really nice,” he admitted, tone sincere as he wrapped you in his arms and pulled you in for a hug. You held on to him tightly, not wanting him to go. “I’m glad you came. Mum really likes you youknow,” “She’s incredible, you’re a lot alike actually,” he mused, releasing you. You made a face. “I wish,” He reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “I’ll text you tonight?” “Okay,” you nodded reluctantly.   
Jason took a step back, and it was only then that you noticed the motorbike parked in your driveway. You frowned. “Drive safely!” He looked back over his shoulder to smirk at you. “Don’t worry doll,”   
You watched wistfully as he straddled the seat and put on his helmet, standing in the doorway until he was out of sight. Once he was gone you let out a shaky breath you hadn’t even realized you’d been holding and went back inside to join your mum. She was sitting in the living room watching tv, and she smiled when you walked in. “That boy is lovely. I’m so proud of you sweetie,” You shook your head, joining her on the couch, phone in hand. “I know he is,” You admitted. You didn’t notice that you were waiting for Jason to text until the screen was unlocked and you were looking at your inbox.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Completely forgot to update this on here! Thus the four chapters at once.. sorry to anyone who's been following this on Ao3 only!!

  
After that day you and Jason ended up spending a lot more time together. Starting the next evening when he decided to surprise you by picking you up after class.  
You had your head down, contemplating the reading list you had just been given as you walked; you narrowly avoided walking straight into one of the many girls clustered around the front gates. You looked up in confusion at the large gathering of girls giggling and whispering by the entrance, completely blocking your way. “Excuse me,” you mumbled, wedging your way through the press of bodies, simultaneously trying to figure out what had everyone so excited. Once you were clear of the gates it became immediately apparent what had caught their attention. Just opposite, your boyfriend was leaning against his bike, arms folded across his chest. He was wearing his leather jacket, hair tousled almost artfully from the helmet. Your heart fluttered in your chest. He was outrageously gorgeous. 

Jason didn’t notice you at first, staring absently down the street, apparently disinterested in his newfound fans. You approached him hesitantly, trying to ignore the feeling of dozens of eyes on your back when it became clear that you intended to speak to him. “Jay? What are you doing here?” Jason noticed you then, face breaking out in a wide grin as he straightened up. “Hey there doll. I was in the neighbourhood and figured you might want a ride,”  
There was a scandalized outburst from the girls behind you at that. You blushed, eyeing his bike as though it might jump up and bite you. “With you?” you stammered, taking a cautious step back. Jason chuckled. “Yes, with me,” He stepped forward so that there were only inches between you and reached for your hand, stroking his thumb over your knuckles. “It’s fine if you don’t want to sweetheart. But I promise I won’t let anything happen to you,” he reassured quietly. “Urm,” You gulped, making the mistake of looking up into his sincere blue eyes. “Okay..” Jason smiled, releasing you and turning to produce a helmet, pressing it into your hands.  
Once your bookbag was secured, you clambered on behind him. “Just hold on tight babe,” You didn’t need to be told. You were already clinging onto his waist for dear life. You squeezed your eyes shut when he gunned the engine, and the next thing you knew you were flying. Involuntarily your eyes flew open. The streets of Gotham were speeding past in a blur. You gasped, tightening your hold on your boyfriend further when adrenaline spiked through your veins.  
You reached your house in what felt like only seconds. Your legs were like jelly; Jason had to help you down from the bike. When you took off the helmet you were still breathless, beaming up at him. Jason laughed fondly, reaching out to smooth your tousled hair. “Still scared?” He teased. “When can we do that again?” Your words were half a demand, half a plea. Jason just pulled you against his chest and pressed his lips firmly to yours. 

~~~~~

A couple of weeks passed, and Jason was now pretty much always in your house. You would have begun to question whether or not he actually had a real job if he didn’t disappear almost immediately once the sun had gone down every evening. “You never told me you worked night shifts,” you had complained the first night he had gotten up to go having finished the movie you were watching. He had shrugged, amusement lacing his tone when he replied, “Security business doll,” 

Other than that and during classes, you were very rarely apart anymore. Jason almost always picked you up after that first day; one time you had come home early to find him in your kitchen drinking coffee and chatting with your mum. You didn’t even know why you were surprised anymore. Be it a blessing or a curse, the two of them had only grown closer during the last few weeks. You were pretty sure at this stage that they were conspiring together to draw you out of your self imposed isolation, but honestly you didn’t even care. For the first time in as long as you could remember you actually felt something akin to happiness. 

~~~~~

Friday had slowly but surely become movie night for you and Jason. Changing jobs had allowed your mum to start taking an evening course at the local tuition center, and Jason went to work later on that day every week. Apparently it was movie night for his family too. You put it down to the perks of being involved in a family business.  
You had been on a few dates outside of the house by now, but cuddling up with Jason on the couch with a pile of blankets and your favourite dvd’s remained your favourite thing to do with him. Not that you didn’t enjoy it when you went out together, but reading dates in your favourite coffeeshop or trips to the cinema didn’t allow you the closeness that you had come to crave so desperately. Just resting against his shoulder, fingers intertwined in his; it calmed and soothed you like nothing else had ever done before. 

You were just falling asleep against Jason’s chest when his phone vibrated on the coffee table. You grumbled sleepily, opening your eyes just enough to glare at the offending object. Jason huffed a laugh, stroking his fingers through your hair in a soothing manner and reaching for his phone with the other hand. He was quiet for a moment while he read the message and you held your breath, hoping that whatever it was wouldn’t take him away from you so early into the evening. It was already unfair that he had to leave at all, losing those extra few hours was just cruel. Your fears were confirmed when Jason sighed, pocketing his phone and reaching for his keys on the table. Reluctantly you let go of your hold on him, sitting upright. “You have to go,” It wasn’t a question. Jason grimaced at you apologetically, placing a kiss to your forehead before he stood up. “Sorry sweetheart. There’s a problem at W.E that they need my help with. I can’t say no,”  
You stood, wrapping your arms around your waist and following him to the door, drinking in the sight of him as he rushed to pull on his jacket. Quite frankly, you felt cheated by life. Sighing, you spared a glance at the clock by the stairs. It was just before Seven. “It’s okay. I know you can’t help it,”  
Jason grabbed your hand, pulling you in for a kiss. You could sense the longing and frustration in the gesture, and when you eventually parted it was with reluctance. Jason groaned. “God, I don’t deserve you,”  
“Nope. But if you get back here as soon as you can then I’ll let it slide,” you teased. “Doll, they’d have to tie me up to keep me away from you,” Jason smirked, then stopped in the doorway, hesitating. “You sure you’ll be okay?” You rolled your eyes. “Jason Peter Todd. I have survived my entire life without you to look after me. I think I can manage one more day,”  
That made him smile, at least. “Just be careful if you’re leaving the house doll. You know what Gotham’s like at night,” His concern for you melted your heart a little. “I will,” you promised. “I’m just going to run out to get milk, and then I’ll be home for the entire night,”  
Jason kissed you goodbye, and then within seconds he was already on his bike and disappearing down the street. 

It was only then that you allowed the disappointment to really set in. After half an hour or so of moping around the kitchen, you figured you might as well get on with it and go to the shop before it closed for the night. Then when you came back you could make yourself a nice hot chocolate and waste the night away scrolling through the internet and feeling sorry for yourself.  
You grabbed your jacket from the hook by the door, shrugging it on and slipping your feet into your shoes. Thankfully the nearest grocery store was on the next block so it didn’t take you long to get there. You retrieved the milk first, then spent a while hovering in the aisle containing the baking ingredients, turning over the idea of making a cake for after dinner tomorrow. It would pass away some time, at least. You eventually decided that the distraction was worth the extra cost; you had most of the ingredients at home anyway. You gathered the necessary supplies and took them to the checkout. 

Once back outside you noticed that darkness had already fallen. The high rise Gotham skyline made it extra difficult for the evening sun to reach within. You tugged your sleeves down to protect your hands against the growing chill. Keeping your head down, you walked quickly in the direction of your house, hoping not to attract any unwanted attention. However, your efforts were in vain. A few minutes later you heard footsteps approaching from behind. A quick glance over your shoulder revealed two darkly clad men closing in on you. It wasn’t an unusual sight in this part of town, so you didn’t necessarily have a reason to be worried yet. But what scared you wasn’t the men’s appearance; it was the fact that they were both completely silent. For as long as they had been behind you they hadn’t spoken a single word to each other.  
Adrenaline kicked in and you turned back around, picking up the pace. You were only five minutes or so away from home now. It would be fine, you could make it. You turned the next corner and jolted to a halt. Two more men were blocking the way. They were both engulfed in shadow, but once they saw you the first man stepped forward, revealing his face. He smiled widely at you, revealing a set of rotten, jagged teeth. Panic exploded in your chest. You spun around, ready to run for it. Instead you came face to face with one of the men from before. Held in his hand was a broken metal pipe. Meeting your wild eyes, he smirked. “Time for lights out dollface,” He made to swing at you. Time seemed to slow down. You saw the glint of the metal in the light of the streetlamp as it came closer. Instinctively, you screamed. Pain exploded across your skull as the pipe connected with your head.. and then everything faded to black.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is chapter is uber short, nonetheless I hope you guys like it!! Thanks for sticking with me this far!!

Jason grumbled as he finished tying up the last of the would-be bank robbers, giving the guy a kick in the shin for good measure when he cursed at him. Of course they’d had to pick his one night with his soulmate to pull this shit. He’d been patroling the area ever since he had met you, and the worst he’s encountered were petty street fights and kids trying to buy drugs in some of the shadier alleyways. But no. These guys had picked the one night that the Batman and his allies took a couple extra hours off in the evening, and guess who just so happened to be closest to the scene because of that? You guessed it. They were just unlucky that Oracle was keeping a lookout, otherwise they would have been home free. 

Jason scaled the rusty fire escape of a nearby apartment complex, and was three roofs over before he heard the sirens indicating that the police had finally made an appearance. He didn’t need to find a clock to guess the time; the chatter of the team over the commlink in his ear was enough to confirm that it was at least Nine. He paused briefly to mute the channel; listening to his siblings bicker while he was on patrol irritated Jason to no end. 

He was deliberating over whether or not to do a quick check of your neighborhood before circling back for his bike when his comm chirped in his ear, making his decision for him. “Oracle to Red Hood. Are you there?” Barbara’s voice was clear and cool over the frequency of his private channel. “Nobody died. You can spare me the lecture,“ Jason rolled his eyes, fumbling with the clasp on inside pouch of his jacket. If he was going to have to stand here and have his methods criticised, he was having a goddamn cigarette. Bruce’s disapproval be damned, it wasn’t like it had ever bothered him before. 

“Focus Hood,” If his snide comment had bothered her it didn’t show. “There’s a situation two blocks east of where you are, street level. The camera image isn’t great, but there looks to be four, maybe five men attempting to corner a civilian girl. You might want to take a look,” 

Jason’s fingers froze on the clasp. Two blocks east of here.. that was less than five minutes from where you lived. He knew it was unlikely that it was you; it was Friday night for God’s sake, there were plenty of civilians still milling around. But you had said you were going out…   
“I’m on it,” He cut the connection, taking a running start towards the roofs edge. 

Jason reached the alleyway just in time to see you crumple to the ground, a thin trail of blood seeping from a gash in your scalp. He froze in shock, his whole body going cold as ice while his brain tried to process the sight of you beaten and unconscious on the ground, tried to reconcile it with the happy, smiling memory of you from earlier that evening. 

It was like someone had flipped a switch in Jason’s brain, because suddenly his blood was boiling with anger. A feral snarl erupted from his throat, alerting the group of men to his presence. The first two had to turn to look at him, and he took the momentary hesitation to pounce. The man closest to him took a punch straight to the face, instantly knocking him out cold. The second man was more prepared, swinging a metal pipe at Jason’s chest. He dodged, growling, and spun to deliver a brutal kick into the man'a stomach that sent him flying into the nearest wall. He impacted with a sickening crunch before going limp.   
Still not satisfied, he turned to the last pair. They had abandoned your still body in favour of beating a hasty retreat into the darkened alleyway. Jason wasn’t about to let that slide. His fingers twitched towards the holster on his thigh, but he decided against it. He wanted this to be more.. personal. It took him less than three seconds to catch up. He grabbed one of the men by the collar, throwing him into his partner so that they both fell over in a heap of tangeld limbs, groaning in pain. Jason smirked coldly, cracking his knuckles. The other two were lucky to be unconscious. 

Jason didn’t waste much time returning to where you lay twisted on the cold tarmac. Adrenaline still coursed through his veins, making it difficult to think straight. He pressed two slightly shakey fingers to your neck, exhaling loudly when he felt your pulse under his touch. Gently he scooped you up into his arms, craddling you to his chest as though you might shatter in his hold. Jogging back to where he had left his bike, he had to readjust you against his shoulder to activate his commlink. “Babs. Tell Alfred to get the medbay set up. She has a head injury. I’ll be there in ten,” 

“Red Hood, do you need backup?” She had clearly sensed the strain in Jason’s voice, judging by how she hadn’t told him off for using her name over the coms. He shook his head, even though she couldn’t see it. Actually, being Oracle, she probably could. He didn’t care. “No. Just make sure everything’s ready,” “I will. Oracle out,” The static faded from his ear, signaling that she had closed the line. It was good timing too, as Jason could see his bike leaning against the alley wall from here. He looked down at you, expression pained. The thought of losing you was unbearable. _‘Just hang on a little longer. Please,’_ If he hadn’t gotten there fast enough, if you were hurt too badly, Jason would never be able to live with himself. 

~~~~~

  
When the bike skidded to a stop in the cave Alfred was there along with Bruce, already hurrying towards you. “Master Jason, bring her over here. I’ll need to check her injuries, make sure it’s nothing serious before we rule out the necessity of taking her to a hospital. Jason followed Alfred to a bed in the corner, laying you down gently and wincing when you just flopped limply against the sheets. He hadn’t even considered taking you to a hospital first himself. Which was stupid, he berrated himself, but he knew that if he did that he would have had to leave you there alone. The Red Hood couldn’t just walk in and sit in the waiting room, and there was no rational explanation as to how Jason Todd would have known about what happened. No, this had been the better option. 

There was nothing to do now but wait while Alfred examined you, and Jason felt suddenly helpless. While he had been saving you from those thugs he had been useful, in motion. But now he could do nothing to help you. He hardly noticed that Bruce had approached until he was right beside him, watching the scene unfold with keen eyes. “Is she the one?” His voice was quiet, he never even took his eyes off of Alfred when he spoke. Jason nodded thickly, swallowed. “Yeah. She’s.. yeah,” 

Bruce did look at him then. His eyes were sharp, keen, but his expression was soft overall, his forehead creased in concern. He gripped Jason’s shoulder firmly. _'Again with the shoulder thing,’_ Jason thought, perplexed, but then Bruce was turning to face him fully, holding his other shoulder too and meeting Jason’s suddenly watery gaze. “It’s going to be alright son,” 

Bruce’s tone was firm, reminding Jason of when he was a kid and Bruce’s matter of fact way of speaking used to reassure him and make him feel safe, secure. Jason nodded, and then he just broke down, leaning into Bruce’s embrace and letting out a choked off sob. The older man wrapped his arms around him, holding his son tightly as he fell apart in his grasp. 

~~~~~

You woke up in an unfamiliar room. Sunlight steamed around the edges of the curtains, casting beams of golden light across the soft cream and gold sheets that someone had tucked in around you. The next thing you noticed was Jason, sitting in a chair pulled up next to the bed. His arms were folded on the duvet by your side, his head resting on top of them as he slept. His hair was tousled in such a way that you could tell he’d been running his fingers through it, and there were dark purple circles under his eyes. 

You frowned, confused as to how you had gotten here. Why did Jason look so exhausted? You reached out to stroke his hair back from his face. Your arms felt like lead, and slowly you began to register a dull pounding behind your temples. You winced, closing your eyes and trying to focus on the feel of Jason’s hair beneath your fingers, the sound of his slow, even breathing in the otherwise silent room. You took a deep breath, concentrating, and eventually the pain started to subside enough to be considered bearable. When you opened your eyes again Jason was looking up at you blearily, just barely awake. You smiled. “Good morning,” His answering smile was slow, almost hesitant. You noticed with puzzlement that he seemed almost relieved, for some reason you couldn’t fathom. “Hey there doll. How are you feeling?” 

“My head hurts,” you admitted, grimacing. “Any idea why that would be? Also, just on a sidenote, where are we?” Jason winced sympathetically, sitting up to grab a glass of water and some pills that you hadn’t noticed were on the bedside locker until now, and handed them to you. “You don’t remember?” You took them gratefully, swallowing back the pills and finishing off the entire glass, trying not to notice the way his tone sounded off. 

“No? Should I?” You paused. “I’m not hungover am I? Because my mum would kill me,” Jason shook his head, taking the glass from your hand and setting it back on the locker. “No,” he managed a wry smile, taking your hands in his. “You have a head injury sweetheart. You were attacked walking home from the shop. They hit you with a metal bar,” Something in his eyes when he said that made your blood run cold. You shivered subconsciously. “How did I get here then?” You still couldn’t remember, and it was bothering you immensely. Like a name you just couldn’t remember, fluttering at the edges of your consciousness just out of your grasp. 

And then you thought of something. “Ohmygod. Does my mum know I’m here?! Is she okay?” Panic rose like a poison in your chest and Jason hushed you, placing a hand on yout shoulder to firmly push you back down against the pillows. You hadn’t even made the conscious decision to get up. “Yes, she knows. I called her last night. She doesn’t know all of the details yet, but she knows that you’re safe, so relax,” You closed your eyes, suddenly exhausted. “How did I get here Jay?” you repeated the question. There was a pause, and then, reluctantly, “Doll, there’s something I need to tell you,”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only the epilogue left after this guys!  
> Enjoy!

_“There’s something I need to tell you,”_

For a reason you couldn’t yet fathom your heartrate picked up at his words, and you struggled to push down the sudden nervousness taking root in the pit of your stomach.  
“What is it?” Your voice sounded small even to your own ears. Jason must have picked up on it because he visibly cringed, and reached to entwine his fingers with yours on top of the blankets, stroking soothing circles into your skin with his thumb. 

You would be less on edge about the whole situation if you could actually remember what had happened. All you had for now was the hazy pain dulling your mind and your boyfriend’s account of what had happened. And you trusted Jason. You really did, even despite everything in your very nature telling you that to do so was a bad idea. But something about this situation just screamed ’ _wrong_ ’ at you, as though some great and terrible knowledge loomed just outside the edges of your consciousness and you were terrified of what that might mean. Terrified that maybe you had fallen too fast and too hard, lulled into a false sense of security by the fact that Jason was your soulmate, and whatever explanation he had for what was going on here might just change everything between you.

But for now you decided to take the comfort he offered to you, and squeezed his fingers back. Somewhere along the way the gesture had become important to you. Both of you had been hurt before, and expressing emotions in words wasn’t exactly a strong point for either of you. Taking your soulmate’s hand and just holding on was a quiet reassurance that settled you unlike words ever had. It said _‘I’m with you in this’_ and _‘I’m not letting go’_ and so much more all at once. And right now it was just what you needed. 

  
Jason ran his fingers through his hair, fixing you with a conflicted gaze. Eventually he seemed to come to some kind of decision because he dropped his hand back to the blankets, sighing tiredly. “Look, it’s not…” He struggled for a second, then blurted, “Remember what I told you when we met?”  
You quirked a small smile at that, teasing, “Before or after you followed me home?” “After you ran away,” he corrected automatically, matching your smile with his own, and for a moment the tension between you evaporated.

“I told you I wasn’t exactly the best guy. I don’t think you understood what I-I’m,” he blew out a frustrated breath, abruptly releasing your hand and standing, pacing over to the door before turning back to face you. “Doll I can’t - Let me show you,” His hands were tangled in his hair again, and the haunted look in his eyes twisted your stomach into knots. “Okay,” Suddenly whatever it was didn’t matter anymore, you just wanted more than anything to ease the pain marring his handsome features. “Jay, take your time. It’s okay. I trust you. I’m with you,” The last part was barely above a whisper, but Jason heard it. He visibly relaxed, giving you your favourite crooked smile, albeit a little wobbly. 

There was a light knock on the door, and then a dark haired boy around your age popped his head around the door. You instantly recognised him as Dick Grayson, he was on the covers of Gotham’s magazines too often to not. He seemed surprised when he saw you for some reason, and then his face lit up in an easy smile. You found that you instantly liked him. “Hey, you’re awake! I’m Dick, Jaybird’s big brother. How’re you feeling?” 

You offered him a tentative smile. “Nice to meet you Dick. My head hurts? But Jason says I got hit with a metal bar so I guess that’s to be expected,” He winced sympathetically, nodding. “Yeah concussions suck. From experience, you’ll feel better if you can eat something,” You didn’t miss the glare Jason threw him at that. “Alfred’s making breakfast if you’re feeling up to it?” The questioning glance he threw at Jason then tipped you off that the decision probably wasn’t entirely up to you, which was confirmed when he spoke up. “We’ll be down in a few,” His reply was curt, and it made you wonder.. 

Once Dick was gone you turned your full attention on your boyfriend, raising an eyebrow at him. “Jaybird?” He groaned. “Please ignore everything that comes out of Dick’s mouth,” You grinned. “Jaybird… I think I like it,” you mused. Jason just grimaced. 

You were surprised by how weak you felt when you tried to get up. Jason told you it was due to your concussion. As if the nausea and the pain wasn’t enough. The first thing you did was to call your mum and confirm that you were okay, you were safe and you hadn’t died. Jason had told her that he’d been on his way back to yours when he found you being mugged in the street, and once he’d sent your attackers running he’d brought you back to his family’s personal doctor as it was closer than the hospital. 

The only reason your mum hadn’t come straight over was because when Jason had called her he had let her talk to Alfred, who assured her that you weren’t seriously hurt and you would be fine with them until she got off work in the morning. You were grateful for it, you knew she couldn’t afford the time off and you didn’t like the thought of her worrying about you. You assured her that you were fine to have Jason drop you home after breakfast, and after you finally managed to hang up Jason helped you to the bathroom so you could get cleaned up. 

Half an hour had passed by the time you managed to make it downstairs, leaning on Jason for support and wearing one of his shirts and a pair of leggings he said belonged to a family friend called Barbara. Your head was feeling better, but the sheer terror at the thought of meeting Jason’s family was making up for it. Jason noticed your nerves, and squeezed your waist gently as he guided you down the winding hallways to the kitchen. 

“It’s only Alfred and Tim here, Bruce and Damian are out today. You’ll be fine doll,” “You forgot Dick,” you mumbled, just because you felt like arguing the case, even if his words did bring you some relief. Jason grinned playfully. “Boy wonder doesn’t count, you’ve met him already,” You rolled your eyes, but giggled anyway. “Boy wonder? Like Robin?” Something about that amused Jason, and he chuckled. “Yeah. You could say they’ve got a lot in common,” You mused over that for a minute, effectively distracted from the coming crisis. “So bird nicknames are a family thing huh?” “You have no idea sweetheart,” He shook his head ruefully. 

The kitchen was staggeringly large, as was everything else you had encountered in the manor so far. Despite that, it had a calm and homely atmosphere, something that you appreciated enormously the minute you entered and came face to face with your boyfriend’s family. Or some of it anyway. A man that you assumed was Alfred greeted you immediately with a warm smile, and you were startled to hear him address Jason as ‘Master’, even more so to be addressed as ‘Miss’ yourself. Normally the formality would make you uncomfortable, but something about the butler made you feel at ease. There was a certain note of pride in Jason’s voice when he introduced you, and you barely had a chance to reply before you were both ushered into seats at the breakfast table. 

You instantly recognised Dick from earlier, and the other boy was definitely the infamous Tim Drake, but the girl beside him was as of yet unknown to you. Their quiet chatter ceased when you sat down, and your nervousness instantly resurfaced. You bit your lip, directing your gaze down into your lap. Jason squeezed your fingers beneath the cover of the table. 

“Hey, I’m Tim,” You looked up into the dazzling blue eyes of the boy seated across from you and sipping a coffee. “Um. Hi. I’m-” “We know who you are!” You were cut off by the blonde girl next to him, and left floundering for words as you looked between the two. She giggled. “Oh, sorry! That was rude. I’m Stephanie by the way. I’m Tim’s other half,” Jason snorted next to you. “That’s okay,” you replied quickly. “You’re Tim’s soulmate?” You raised an eyebrow at Jason, confused. He had told you thay he was the first of his brothers to find his other half. The table erupted in chuckles at that, and you blushed instinctively. You were struggling to keep up with what was going on, and your head was starting to spin. “In his dreams. I’m his best friend. And ex girlfriend, but that ship sailed long ago,” Stephanie winked, and was rewarded with a jab to the ribs from Tim. “Owww,” She whined, shooting him a glare, to which he just shrugged, grinning. 

“Feel free to ignore Steph,” Jason interjected, “She never shuts up,” “Heyy!”  
You giggled, meeting your boyfriend’s warm gaze, and instantly feeling a little more at ease.  
“Toast?” You glanced over at Dick, who was offering you a plate piled high with various breads. “It’s easy on the stomach,” His smile was warm, infectious even, and again you were struck by how much you wanted to like him. “Yeah. Thank you,”  
“So tell us. How do you put up with Jason, because honestly you seem too nice to be his soulmate, there has to be something we don’t know about,” Stephanie leaned towards you conspiratorially across the table, and you laughed. “I wouldn’t say I have to put up with him so much as he puts up with me,” you admitted. “Wow. You really are his soulmate,” Tim threw you a disbelieving look, and Jason hummed beside you, his expression smug. “She’s great. We balance each other out,”  
Stephanie scoffed, launching into a tirade of questions about your relationship, which you struggled to keep up with and amused the boys to no end. 

You were exhausted by the time you finally left the kitchen, but happy too. You were surprised by how easily you fit into the dynamic between the others, you had always struggled in groups of people before. Maybe it was because you had Jason with you, but either way you found that despite initially being overwhelmed you really liked them. Apparently Jason could tell, given the knowing smirk he directed at you once you were out in the hallway again. “Shut up,” you nudged him playfully, but didn’t falter in your easy smile.  
“I didn’t say anything doll,” He raised an eyebrow at you, and you just scoffed.  
“No, but you were thinking it,” “Hmm? Thinking what?”  
You huffed. “Jason Todd. I am not going to allow you to coerce me into telling you that you were right. Your ego is big enough as it is,”  
He hummed nonchalantly. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” 

“Where are we going anyway?” You surveyed the office you had just entered curiously, not noticing at first when Jason stiffened beside you. “I’m going to show you what I was talking about earlier,” You eyed the tense set of his shoulders as he let go of your hand, walking over to fiddle with something on the wall opposite. There was a click, and then to your amazement a panel of the wall slid away to reveal a secret entrance. You gaped. Jason quirked a smile at your reaction, gesturing for you to enter. “Is this a common thing in billionaire mansions or is this the entrance to your secret lair?” You stepped into the elevator, Jason following suit, the doors hissing shut behind you. “Neither. It’s Bruce’s,” 

You didn’t have time to question the edge in his voice before the doors were opening to reveal a vast expanse of dimly lit cave. The cold air hit you first, and you gasped, taking in the sight before you, a dull roaring registering in your ears. You knew you were gaping stupidly, but you didn’t even care. Your mind was racing with possibilities. What did this mean? And what did it have to do with what had happened to you last night? You took a hesitant step forward, glancing at Jason who nodded in encouragement before walking out into the cave. 

The first thing you noticed was the bank of computers in the center of the room, seemingly a control base of sorts. Sweeping your eyes across the room you discovered a waterfall, the source of the sound you had noticed a moment ago, then what seemed to be a training area of some sort, a medical bay, and then, and then. Your eyes fixed onto a row of display cases, all lit up from within. Inside each was a costume. Costumes that were both instantly familiar and startlingly surreal to see in person. 

You spun around to face Jason, disbelief and excitement a heady mix in your brain. “This is the batcave?! Bruce Wayne is Batman! Ohmygod, Jason, _what_?” You laughed breathily, unable to wrap your head around the concept. “And the others, they’re.. and you. You must be.. oh. Jay. You’re.. you were Robin?” Realisation dawned on you then, hazy memories flashing behind your eyes. It was years ago, but you still remembered the headlines, the whispers in the hallways at school. Robin had died. Jason had died, legally. He’d said it was a kidnapping, but Robin…

“Jay?” It was only then that you really looked at him, noticed the solemn set of his mouth, the guarded way he watched you from where he still stood by the elevator. He unfolded his arms, approaching you with slow steps that resonated loudly in the vast cavern. “I’m sorry I kept this from you, you deserved to know,” He stopped only a foot away from you, close but not quite touching. “It wasn’t a kidnapping was it?” Your voice was barely above a whisper. Your heartbeat was loud in your ears, making your head throb. “No. I…” He sighed, swearing under his breath as he reached for you. “I’m not the kind of person you think I am doll. I’m bad. Bad for you, and bad for everyone else,” Your brow furrowed in confusion. “I don’t understand. Robin helps people right?” “C'mere. I’ll tell you everything. And then you can decide.. if you still want to be with me,” “Always,” The word was out of your mouth before you could even think about it, and normally you would have been embarrassed, afraid even, but right now it seemed crucial that he knew it. 

Jason didn’t reply, but the hard set of his jaw lost some of it’s tension as he led you over to the display cases. There was a bleakness in his eyes that you absolutely hated, but you felt powerless to wipe it away. He stopped in front of the case containing the Red Hood’s suit, you could feel his eyes on your face as you stared up at it, brows furrowed. It was a moment before it clicked. 

“Oh,” You turned to your boyfriend to confirm your guess. He nodded. “This is me. Probably not the one you would have picked huh?” He gave a self deprecating chuckle that settled like lead in your chest. “No. It isn’t,” You turned to frown at him. “Jay, I wouldn’t pick any of them. The only one I’ll ever pick is you. It doesn’t matter that you’re the Red Hood!” “Doll, I’ve killed people. I still kill people,” His tone was flat. And that fact hadn’t occurred to you until then, but despite the terrible weight of the admission it was still less important than keeping Jason with you. “So you have flaws. Jay, I’m sure you have a reason, and you can explain. But don’t… Jason this doesn’t _change anything_ , I still love you!” You froze, and he did too, the words lingering heavy in the air between you. You swallowed, carrying on shakily. “I love you Jason. And I need you. This doesn’t change that. So.. so just explain. Please,” 

“Doll..” The next thing you knew you were enveloped in Jason’s arms, held tightly against his chest. You exhaled unsteadily, wrapping your arms around him and just holding on. This was huge. You knew that. But you also knew that fundamentally Jason was good, and while the Red Hood was known for his less than merciful ways, he was still ultimately on the good side. For now, that had to be enough. Jason had come to matter to you too much for it to mean anything else. 

You heard as well as felt Jason take a deep breath, and then he was speaking. You closed your eyes, breathing in the scent of oil and gunpowder and Jason as you let his words wash over you, weaving a story of a life now passed behind your eyelids. 

You weren’t aware of how long you had stood there, wrapped up in each other when Jason finished, but it was another few minutes before you could make yourself pull back and look at him. You hadn’t even noticed you were crying until Jason cupped your cheeks in his hands, wiping away the tear tracks on your skin with the pads of his thumbs.

“So that’s me,” His voice was hushed, lips kicking up in a small half smile as he leaned to press his forehead against yours. “I love you Jason,” Your words were confident when you said them this time, even if your voice was wobbly. “I love you too sweetheart,” The words were a breath of air against your face, and you felt your heart swell, threatening to burst free of the confines of your chest. You reached up, closing the last few inches between your lips and kissing him like he was the only thing that mattered in the entire world. In that moment it wasn’t too far from the truth. 

When at last you parted you didn’t go far, staying locked in each others arms. “You’re sure about this sweetheart?” You stared up into the endless blue depths of his eyes, feeling as though they were drowning you and saving you all at once. “I have never been more sure of anything in my life. So you can stop asking me, because it’s not going to change,” You tightened your grip on him, and he smiled your favorite crooked smile. “Good. Because doll, after this, I’m not letting go,” “You better not,” You matched his smile with a grin of your own, and you thought to yourself with a certainty that you rarely felt, that this was what home felt like. Jason responded by capturing your lips in another kiss.


	8. Epilogue

 Your gaze shifted between the entrance to the cave, the clock and Alfred’s face anxiously. You were bouncing on the balls of your feet, fidgeting with the gear laid out on a table near the main control panel. “Alfred-” “Soon Miss Y/n. They won’t be much longer now,” Alfred smiled kindly at you, fond amusement twinkling in his eyes at your impatience. “They’re later than usual..” You mumbled, mostly to yourself, leaving the butler to return to organizing the med bay.

 It had been more than half a year now but you still got nervous when it was time for Bruce and the boys to come back from patrol. You were spared the agony of further waiting when there was the rumble of an engine outside, and then Nightwing came flying through the entrance, a blur of black streaked with blue, followed by Red Robin’s distinctive black and yellow and Red Hood’s black and red, and finally the Batmobile. 

You breathed a sigh of relief, jogging over to where Jason had parked his bike. Once he had dismounted and turned to face you, you reached up, removing his helmet to reveal your soulmate’s handsome face. He shook out his hair, gave you his signature grin, eyes bright from the adrenaline that still coursed through is veins. “Hey there gorgeous,” He leaned down to capture your lips in a soft kiss. You smiled against his mouth, reaching for the lapels of his jacket. The kiss was chaste, but it didn’t stop Dick from letting out a long whistle when you pulled apart. A couple of months ago you would have blushed, but now you just smiled, pressing your forehead to Jason’s.

 “Hi,” you breathed, giggling. He chuckled, wrapping his arms around you. “Master Jason, if I could borrow Miss Y/n for a minute, Master Timothy needs his leg seen to,” Jason released you and you turned to appraise Tim, becoming mildly alarmed at the sight of the growing blood stain in his suit. “Tim are you okay!?” You ushered him over to the med bay, ignoring his feeble protests of being fine.

 Jason went to shower while you tended to Tim’s leg. You chatted amicably with Alfred, Bruce and the boys about their night while you stitched up the gash that ran the full length of Tim’s leg, hardly even wincing as you did so. When you had first started helping Alfred treat the boys injuries, just the sight of blood had made you feel sick. Now you were proud to say that the only thing that bothered you was causing them any pain, which you tried your best to avoid.

 “Holy cow Tim this is deep, what happened?” You marveled at his nonchalance; trying not to dwell on the fact that it was because he had been through much worse, that they all had. Damian, who was sitting on the bench opposite Tim’s, snorted mockingly. 

“Drake simply fell into a dumpster. He only has himself to blame,” “I wouldn’t have if someone hadn’t taken my grapple without telling me,” Tim shot back instantly, ready to argue despite being exhausted.

 “Tsk. You call yourself a detective Drake, surely you should have noticed it was missing. Tim made to reply but was swiftly interrupted by Bruce. “Boys. That’s enough,” You struggled to hide your smile when both brothers huffed and looked away. You had spent almost as much time at the manor as you had at home these last few months, and you had quickly become used to the boys squabbling. It amused you to no end most of the time, and you had somehow become the mediator when it went too far and Bruce wasn’t around. Jason’s family had become like your own during the time you had spent together, life without them already felt like a distant memory. 

 It wasn’t long before Jason emerged, fresh from the shower and dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt. You had just finished fixing up Tim’s leg, and you bade your goodnights soon after. Jason wrapped his arms around you in the elevator and you settled back against his chest comfortably. “I heard you did good out there tonight,” You could tell that Bruce was pleased with Jason’s progress, although he tried not to show it. He still slipped up now and again, but it had been months since Jason had killed anyone, even though he admitted he often felt they deserved it. Jason hummed, nuzzling into your hair. “How’s your mom?”

 You smiled. “She’s good. She went out for dinner again last night,” Your mom met her soulmate a few weeks ago. You had been almost as surprised as she was, but you were happy too. He had seemed nice the few times you had met him when he was picking your mom up for a date, and you were delighted to see her happy, even if it was a tentative happiness for now. “Alfred wants her to call over for tea again soon,” Jason chuckled. “So he told me,” Alfred and your mom had bonded over their mutual passion for cooking, much to you and Jason’s amusement. 

 Once upstairs it didn’t take long before you were crawling into bed and snuggled up to Jason’s chest under the covers. It was quiet for a few minutes, just the soft sounds of your breathing and Jason's fingers playing with your hair. "Thanks for staying sweetheart," Jason's voice was soft in the darkness. You nudged him gently. "Jay I would stay all the time if I could, you don't need to thank me," "No I mean, with me. After you found out what I am. I don't think I could have handled losing you doll," Your hold on his shirt tightened at that. 

"What you are is good and caring and sweet Jason. Of course I stayed. I'll always be here for you, for as long as I can," You paused for a moment, and then, "I couldn't have handle losing you either. And not just because you're my soulmate. You're my best friend too. I would have loved you even if you weren't," You felt your cheeks heating up at the admission and you hid your face against his chest, even though in the dark he couldn't see it. "I don't know what I did to deserve you sweetheart," Jason held you tightly against him, placing a kiss to the top of your head. 

"You don't have to to deserve me, you just have to love me," You joked lightly, and were rewarded when Jason playfully tickled your sides. You giggled and squirmed, swatting at his hands. "I think I can manage that," You could hear the grin in his voice when he grabbed you and rolled over onto his back, pulling you onto his chest. You reached up to kiss him, soft and slow, before curling up on his chest. Late as it was, it didn't take long before you were both asleep, content as never before now that you were together.


End file.
